Anisoara Preda,
co-founder

Have you met a Phoenix?

Some birds are well-known, others are legendary. But very few mythical creatures are considered as great as the immortal P h o e n i x Bird, which had the gift of dying in flames and being reborn from its own ashes. 
I was 19 years old and the feeling of 'dying' was present in me, more present than life. Perhaps it was due to the fact that I ‘met’ my grandmother's death on my father's side much too early, the grandmother who slept with me until I was 14, when I left home to go to the high school, in the nearby city. 

I remember the moment like it was yesterday. I was living in the city with my Biological family :mom, dad, brother and sister. I was in the senior year, in high school. It was a winter day. It snowed a lot, February, 1981. My father’s brother, who raised me, came from the country home and told us that my grandmother had had a stroke. She couldn't speak. I saw both my fathers crying. My grandmother was 77 years old and, widow, had been a good guide for their lives.

A woman with a lot of faith, but fierce at times -some of her manifestations I also found in myself along the way. 
It all happened so quickly, I blamed myself for neglecting her in the last year, being far too busy to learn. I cried a lot in the aftermath of my grandmother's death.

I was getting ready to move on to a new stage in my life, but it hung heavy in my heart, the death of the first loved one in my family, coming at a time when I needed to focus on the future. I was trying to forget, to stop crying, exams were approaching. Still, I passed them with flying colors. 
In fall, I was a student at the Faculty of Mathematics. But I felt drained, without energy, without zest for life, as if I was dying little by little. I didn't understand what was going on, I made efforts to integrate in to student groups, but I felt alone, rejected, abandoned...

MUCH LATER I UNDERSTOOD HOW THESE WOUNDS'GUIDED'MY LIFE FROM THEDARKNESS, wounds we all have to a lesser or greater extent, wounds that lead every one of us to suffering.

MAY SEEM INCREDIBLE, BUT IT'S TRUE!

After two years of hard work, I told my parents that I could not continue. I felt that I couldn't be a good teacher and even told myself 'better a good worker than a bad teacher'. In their great love, my parents understood me because they saw me drained. I felt like I was 80 years old, I wasn't happy about anything. There followed a year during which I stayed at home, in the countryside, playing the guitar, reading, often walking on the hill and sometimes losing track of time, bringing fresh flowers from the field, to have the fragrance of the field in my room. 

Come winter, I wanted to learn how to ski and I remembered that my father had brought the skis he had bought for my brother. So I grabbed the skis and went up the hill, without any preparation, I got on my skis and... down the hill with me...

What happened next? 
It's easy to imagine...

I fell and landed directly on my tailbone —at the very base of my spine. What followed were three weeks of lying flat on my stomach. I hardly healed.
Could this have been the moment when the Kundalini Energy awoke, forced the sacred bone and began to 'illuminate' my path?! 

I don't know. 
But I know that after those years in which I felt like the Phoenix Bird, first living and seeing how my dreams were destroyed, as if they burned altogether and I was no longer me. Then I started to feel like living, with desire to live. So I got a job as a laborer, with the help of my father. I liked being useful. From my first paycheck I bought a pick-up and started collecting  music records. I listened insatiably to Bach's' Fugile', Vivaldi, Tchaikovsky, Nino Rossi - 'Ilsilenzio', but also Compact,Pink Floyd and many others. I was in the world of sound and harmony for hours after work.

I don’t think so.

‘By chance’, I met an acquaintance who told me that she had enrolled in the painting course at the People's Art School. I felt I had to enroll myself. There followed 3 years in which I got to know people, lights and shadows, colors, paints and canvases. During these studies, I could hardly distinguish Light from Shadow and could hardly position anything in space. Color, however, saved me - I harmonized it every time.
We were a nice group of many young people and among them, my future husband.

Incredible?
...may seem incredible.

But, for most of us humans, certain beliefs that we have adopted as the key to our own life beliefs, values, have determined our actions. They may or may not give us the will to fight to succeed, often in illusory directions......or cause us to work ourselves to exhaustion if we are persistent and do not realize that we are on the wrong road -the road of life, of course.

Let me tell you...

I fell in love and we lived a beautiful love story. It all happened quickly. The relationship evolved and we became a couple. I had a family and I was 'within the norm’. A young, modern family–we were both tall, handsome, with potential... we looked very good in society. 
Everyone around envied us. 

It quickly became an image that I cared very much about and, coupled with the religious vow to be together 'for better or for worse, till death do us part', even if things were not so good and each of us was pulling in a different direction, I tried to lead the relationship towards a common goal. It had been three years and we were trying left-handedly, but no one could see, from the outside, that we were not really doing very well, as a family... I mean, we didn't really know where to go.

Living in the moment is wonderful! However, I discovered much later that LIVING IN THE PRESENT, HAS AREAL MEANING and doesn't lead to the same result.

We were just living in the moment. In June 1991, my biological mother, after the separation from my father, having had financial debts, suffered a strong depression, which ended with her death. Again there came that deep feeling of the destruction of all my dreams, nothing mattered anymore,the feeling of the ashes of the Phoenix Bird reappeared...again, I felt that my whole life was ashes.

It lasted more than a year, during which time I was just trying to understand what happens to the soul after death. I was just searching for answers, going to church, I discovered prayer, fasting, confession, impartation and I started to be 'weird' in the family. 

If family reunions coincided with a religious fast day and I wasn’t eating, my in-laws started to comment. Something began to break then, without anyone realizing it. Or maybe it was meant to be. I was absent from my husband's life, as I was looking for answers from the other side. 

One evening, after I had prepared the sweets for my mother’s 6-months memorial, as I was tired, I lay down on the bed in the bedroom and, looking at the table, satisfied that I had succeeded in what I had set out to do, suddenly, the spikes in the vase started a game, as if something or someone was moving them. A feeling of joy came over me, as if I could feel my mother enjoying herself, but I also got scared. As soon as I got scared, everything stopped. I checked to see if there was a gust of wind or something, but the window was closed, the balcony closed, so there was no way. The curtain was heavy and it hadn't moved. I was left with a feeling as if my mother's soul was communicating to me the joy beyond.

From the desire to know more and more, searching, I also started hatha yoga classes. 

There followed 5 years of meditation, physical postures, awareness of my own vital energy, I became vegetarian for a year. In my free time, I was only concerned with knowledge, seeking to learn, to discover more. 
My husband followed me, trying to keep up with everything I wanted. I thought we were happy. But time showed us we weren't. As we were finding it harder and harder financially, in the afternoon I started a job in a network marketing company. I said to my husband: 'with you or without you, I'm going to do this anyway.' And, of course, he followed me.

But I didn't know that frustrations were building up in him. He was a cheerful person, I didn't le this unfulfillment show.

At one point, when he was on his way to a product shipment, the order money of the network members was stolen from his car. A period of increasing frustration and problems began. We no longer knew how to deal with the situation, we borrowed money at interest. Gradually, we made mistake after mistake and I had accumulated a lot of debt. 

One compromise today, another tomorrow... that's how I accumulated financial debts, often making decisions on my own, in areas where I thought we would perform together. It wasn't as I thought! 
We have a saying in Romania:'the count at home does not match the market reality'
But in the back of my mind, I was always thinking that I had to do my bestto to be together until death do us part. I was afraid I might lose him. I was adopted by my father's brother when I was 2 years old. I had already lost a family. 

Subconscious fear worked along with religious conviction and I didn't want to see anything other than marriage at any cost. Although each of us showed visible signs that we preferred to live life differently, we carried on...
He made efforts to follow me in my desires, but when it was necessary to make changes, to find solutions to the debts we had, he left Romania, to work abroad. After the situation began to balance out, he allowed himself to live life from his heart and do what he loved, but not for the money.

It's just that I had accumulated a lot of frustrations and dissatisfaction, I didn't understand why he didn't think like me, why he didn't want to build something together. I was at home, still struggling, I got sick and needed surgery. I had come quite close to living separation from him, through my own death...

Again the feeling of ALL ASHES and the recall of the Phoenix Bird.

BUT I WAS GIVEN ANOTHER CHANCE...

What happened next?

It was around Easter. As a rule, I threw away what I no longer needed. Putting the books in the library, I found articles cut out from the As newspaper, which I bought every week, especially to help the man who was selling the papers, as he was old, with many burdens.

I was attracted by an article about a conference to be held in May, in Bucharest, by Geoffrey Hoppe –the article showed a phone number for more info. Without thinking, I dialed the number and spoke to the organizers. A lady answered and said I could still register for the conference. I put the phone down, I was happy, I had already read Geoffrey Hope's books with 'The Teachings of Tobias'. When I looked up the article again, I realized that the date of the article was a year ago!!!!

What assent from God, from the Universe? 

Thus began the next stage of my search. Just one step, to find myself in September and October at the Reconnective Healing and Reconnection Practitioner Training Courses -the first series of courses in Romania in 2007. 

I had no money, but when you let yourself be guided by God, by your Soul, The Universe brings you everything you need. So I borrowed all the money for courses, where I went for my own answers, my own healing, because my life had no logic.

I thought I had done everything I knew best, up to that point, but nothing had worked for me. 
The first course in Romania was well attended by many therapists, among them some of the most important people in the field. I didn't know much, but I had a great time when Dr.Eric Pearl said that if you don't know anything about healing, it's ideal, because you have nothing to give up.

I knew nothing. I FELT THAT THIS TIME I WAS STARTING FROM THE OPTIMUM POSITION.

And it turned out that it was.

The Personal Reconnection followed, during which I felt an indescribable joy of the soul and a wholeness of my own being, coming from all parts of the Universe. I felt one with the Earth, with the Cosmos. At the end of the reconnection session, I saw myself as a child of Light, being held by the left hand of my mother and the right hand of my father, both parents of Light.  

An extremely accelerated evolution process followed after that session. It was like the pieces of the puzzle of life began to change their meaning, their orientation. I decided to dedicate myself exclusively to healing. I quit my job and in March 2008, I opened my own practice. A phase of inner reconstruction followed. I realized that I could and trusted to be part of the healing process of any person who really wanted healing.

Why do I say 'really'?

Many do not want that. They just want to be heard, to be loved, to receive  attention, validation and more. I had been through such phases myself.

When you really want healing, nothing can stand in your way. Your Soul orchestrates everything -you just have to be present and listen.

I know it is not easy, but it is simple. I began to understand, to know, to apply, followed years of study, courses, work, years of evolution and a new relationship, a new husband, both evolving, both working, both studying together. Well, new dreams, new plans for the future.

Only the Phoenix Bird, was there and silently, from the shadows, still watching me. In April, 2018, one Saturday morning, before preparing dinner, my husband fell down and never got up. I didn't think that this was how we would part for good, that this would be his departure in to other dimensions, but that was it.

What did I feel?

I felt I had come to an end. In front of me was everything unknown-nothing that I had thought the day before. My mind was flooded with all sorts of thoughts, from: 'Why didn't I insist that he go to the doctor more often, to get checked?' to 'Why couldn't I do anything?', 'Why couldn't I squeeze him tightly, that maybe he would comeback and not go...?’ ‘Why?

'I was working with myself and had become a good observer of my own mind. I apologized and forgave myself that I couldn't do otherwise.

Then, I thought, at a time, each thought that I knew would drag me down into depression and helplessness, I observed it and let it leave my mind, closed that vulnerable mind corridor and stared straight ahead at that blank white sheet, on which nothing was projected, no desire, no dream....

Seeking my own healing, I was inspired and guided. Studying the Miracle Course and connecting with the Liberations, which I utilize from 'The Teachings of Tobias', I developed Energetic EmpowermentTM, bringing the true gift of forgiveness.

I was working with myself on “themes” that kept me away from peace of mind. Trying to remember what I had been working on, it was as if it had all been wiped away using a sponge, there was just a white sheet in my soul and mind. I began to feel much more vital and my thoughts were much clearer, I was becoming a different person every day, renewed, as if I was a renewed soul.

If at the age of 21 I felt my soul had been emptied, as if I was80, now, I feel my soul as of a young person, who is taking steps towards the fulfillment of true dreams, those that come from the soul.

Reborn again.

From here and from the meeting with Ozana, a meeting orchestrated by God some years ago, when I participated in her business mentoring programs to grow my business, over 20 programs were born, developed together.

I hope that my story will inspire you to get to know those parts of your being that uplift you and then you can sing your own song, your own score, which is hidden deep inside your soul.

I'd love to know your story, the song of your life.